|one of Claire's first photos|
You guys are going to have to have a little boy pretty soon.
These comments are making debuts more often in my conversations with friends and family lately. Claire is 18 months now and for some reason everyone else in the world thinks that since she is walking around, babbling her mouth off, we are thinking about getting pregnant soon. I'm ashamed to admit that these comments are getting to me a bit and I have had babies on the brain. This post is not meant to be a final decision or anything, more of a space to express my thoughts and perhaps get some insight.
Danny and I were almost sure we have completed our family. As you can imagine, parenthood changes every day. We have our easy days and our hard days. Our sleepless nights and giggle-fests. The thing is, we love our easy days and our hard days as a family of three. Our easy days don't necessarily make us long to expand our family. They make us grateful that we have the abundant time and energy to devote to Claire and Claire only.
I worry about bringing a newborn into the mix and shaking up our family life. If the experience is anything like our life with Claire the first year, then our relationships would most likely be strained and time would be even harder to juggle.
In my opinion, the decision to have a second child is much harder than the decision to have your first. Having a second means changing a family. It means making a huge change in not only a marriage, but also in the first child's life. I worry about suffering from anxiety and having the anxiety affect not only Danny this time, but a toddler now too. But then again, I worry too much. Look at me, I am worrying about worrying too much! :)
I think every family is unique. Some people loved being an only child. Some hated their siblings...and still do! If we do decide to have more than one child, it isn't guaranteed that they will all be one giant happy family like they are= on Brothers and Sisters (I am watching this show on Netflix all the way through...for the second time, ha).
For now, Danny and I have decided to table the conversation. We were never discussing having another one very soon anyway, just my plan-and-worry-for-the-future self wanted to talk about a few years down the road. So that is that, I am not allowed to worry about this for a little while. I'm a little relieved to have put that little rule in place. I will just focus on my one little sweet girl for a while :)
|on our walk the other day|
But to keep feeding my curiosities a little bit, for other moms or dads, how did you know if and when you wanted to expand your family? Did your mind ever change one way or the other?